In an ideal world, sex should be similar to an earth shattering experience that should leave you and your partner feeling giddy days after. This is not usually so however mostly because there are a lot of things that tend to have a negative effect on our sex lives which perhaps is the reason why more and more people are on the lookout for guidance from sex therapy experts.
You are in luck as you don’t have to provide cash or suffer the embarrassment of discussing your sex life with a third party as we provide 6 Reasons and solutions that can help improve your sex life.
Different Libido Levels and Sex Drives
We all have different sex drives which is one of the top ranked reasons why some partners detest sex with each other. The quickest solution to this is to dig deep into each other’s sex life in the past and make necessary adjustments to your present sexual lives. For example, if you used to masturbate say twice a week in the past to prime up your sex drive and your partner does nothing like this, you may want to try cutting back on this slowly especially if the routine prepares you for unlimited sexual action. Cutting back can help to bring your sex drive closer to that of your partner. If they prefer to up the ante, you may also want to consider improving on your stamina so as to match up with theirs by going solo some times.
Lack of Planning
This may sound funny but a large number of people still believe that sex should just happen out of the blue without being planned. In truth, spontaneous desires are hot but they mostly happen at the beginning of a relationship when you and your partner can’t keep your hands off one another but it usually doesn’t last long. Every human naturally prefers responsive desires to spontaneous desires which simply means that we want to get aroused following a step by step method. Chances are you and your partner will feel more secure with each other’s sex lives when you allow room for planning while also getting spontaneous from time to time.
This is more common in women who tend to engage in painful sex because they feel obligated to their partners or as means of acting tough through an unpleasant situation. A lack of lubrication is usually responsible for this but a more serious medical condition known as vaginismus may also be the culprit. This condition causes an involuntary tightening of the vagina during attempted sex and it is estimated that about 10 percent of women experience this condition. The condition is said to be worsened by stress, fear and anxiety. If this is the case, you may want to use more lubricants or contact a gynecologist.
Birth Control Talks
Birth control talks is one of the most serious reasons why some people have a boring sex life. It could be that you or your partner are not in agreement as to what birth control method to employ or if you should even employ one at all. The best solution to this is to find some middle ground with your partner. Try explaining in the most subtle way possible, the reasons why you want birth control and why you think a particular method is best for you both. Try and work out a plan that will get the both of you responsible for providing protection. You can end up choosing a method that you both agreed on and split the cost of providing it or alternatively, rotate between the plans the both of you decided on. This will encourage the both of you to be open and have hotter sex.
Laughing During Sex
This one can really get anyone angry and make sex a herculean task except both you and your partner are in on the joke making you laugh. Sometimes however, a person may start laughing simply because they feel embarrassed which may be a huge turn off for the other person who may have no idea whatsoever why you’re laughing. The best thing to do here is to let your partner in on why you’re nervous and doing this will most likely help to nip in the bud any uncomfortable feelings you may be having.
Breakdown in Communication
The reason why some couples detest having sex is simply as a result of a breakdown in communication outside of the bedroom which may end up affecting their sex lives. Communicating effectively with your partner goes beyond mere words as being present and showing understanding can go a long way.
The bond between you and your partner can be strengthened by each of your taking out time to talk about your feelings without the fear of interruption from the other person. This will help to clarify issues and will also provide a platform to air and listen to each other’s views without the fear of interruption.